Today on First Line Friday is a book I saw in my local used bookstore. It was clearance and the title made me laugh,so I bought it. I hope to read it soon as it looks like a it will be an entertaining, quick, and fun read.
Studies say that children don’t remember all that much, and certainly nothing good, until they are at least six years old.
Celia Rivenbark is an intrepid explorer and acid commentator on the land south of the Mason-Dixon Line. In this collection of screamingly funny essays, you’ll discover:
*How to get your kid into a character breakfast at Disney World (or run the risk of eating chicken out of a bucket with Sneezy)
*Secrets of Celebrity Moms (don’t hate them because they’re beautiful when there are so many other reasons)
*ebay addiction and why “It ain’t worth having if it ain’t on ebay”
*Why today’s children’s clothes make six-year-olds look like Vegas showgirls with an abundance of anger issues
*And so much more!
Celia Rivenbark’s essays about life in today’s South are like caramel popcorn—sweet, salty, and utterly irresistible.
Today on First Line Friday is the book that got me reading again all those years ago. My aunt gave it to me and it literally had me laughing out loud! A coworker even asked if she could borrow it. I need to revisit this book again!
Of course I have secrets.
Meet Emma Corrigan, a young woman with a huge heart, an irrepressible spirit, and a few little secrets:
Secrets from her mother:
I lost my virginity in the spare bedroom with Danny Nussbaum while Mum and Dad were downstairs watching Ben-Hur.
Sammy the goldfish in my parents’ kitchen is not the same goldfish that Mum gave me to look after when she and Dad were in Egypt.
Secrets from her boyfriend:
I weigh one hundred and twenty-eight pounds. Not one eighteen, like Connor thinks.
I’ve always thought Connor looks a bit like Ken. As in Barbie and Ken.
From her colleagues:
When Artemis really annoys me, I feed her plant orange juice. (Which is pretty much every day.) It was me who jammed the copier that time. In fact, all the times.
Secrets she wouldn’t share with anyone in the world:
My G-string is hurting me.
I have no idea what NATO stands for. Or even what it is.
Until she spills them all to a handsome stranger on a plane. At least, she thought he was a stranger.
But come Monday morning, Emma’s office is abuzz about the arrival of Jack Harper, the company’s elusive CEO. Suddenly Emma is face-to-face with the stranger from the plane, a man who knows every single humiliating detail about her. Things couldn’t possibly get worse—Until they do.[Top]